Retarded Animal Baby

Level

KXP

1

0

2

2.5

3

5

4

10

5

20

6

40

7

80

8

160

9

320

10

500

11

750

12

1000

13

1250

14

1500

15

1750

16

2000

17

2250

18

2500

19

2750

20

3000

21

3250

22

3500

23

3750

24

4000

25

4250

26

4500

27

4750

28

5000

29

5250

30

5500

31

5750

32

6000

33

6250

34

6500

35

6750

36

7000

Requisites:

Con 15, Max Int 5

Alignment:

Any C

HD/level:

&d13

Weapon Prof.:

0+level

To Hit Table:

Mon

Save Table:

Mon

Groups:

Monster, Offensive

CF:

3

                

Each Level: Get your LVL in R.A.B. picks (see next page). Most R.A.B’s cost more than one pick. You have the abilities of the types you pick. You may save picks to get a bigger type later. Some can be taken more than once, each "+" based ability gives only +1 more per additional. Non-"+" based abilities may or may not stack; check with the DM.

Level 1 ¶: 1M: Summon a DL=(LVL+2)/3 monster (type Retarded Animal Baby). You gain the abilities that type grants as long as you have that summon.

Level 1: Level 1: Get a free Great Puppalupka familiar (lvl1:immune drugs, lvl9:ignore rabbit familiar immunity, lvl18:use PC codpiece as a weapon).

Level 9: You may use your Retarded Animal Baby picks as Master Monster picks instead.

Level 18: Pick any other Animal class you know. You have all abilities of that class as if 8 levels lower.

# Picks

R.A.B. Type

Effect

1

Cat's Cousin

0, 1/d: Convert a Yu-Gi-Oh or Pokémon card to a spell. You can’t be elven race and paladin classed at the same time.

1

Pico

Free l337speak language and +LVL in Happy Tree Friends picks.

2

Hamster's Gumpa

Venerable continuous and replace hands with hooks (1d6+1Con dmg).

2

Böözy and Karen Böözeborne

Drunk Continuous and you know Ozzy and Black Sabbath spells of SL LVL/2.

3

Cat's Stepdad

Drunk (cont) and Mouth’s P, 3/d: Breath sonic (current hp, save ½ ).

3

Puppy’s Cousin

Female gendered and 1P: Target is F Fucked up (Broken cont)

4

Leprechaun Aliens

Control wild surge effects and +1 DL LVL/2 flying U.F.O. mount.

4

Matt Groening

1M, 3/d: Summon a DL= (LVL+2)/2 Simpson character.

5

F*cking F*cker

Free General Superhero Costume and P*M: Song of Metal (LVL^2 dmg).

5

David Lovelace

+1 GGL pick and Severe Allergy to peanut butter.

6

Sean Connery

Severe verbal slur and +1 DL (LVL+2)/2 Ship ona Horizon Mount.

6

Stan (Satan)

Demonic racial adjective and +1 tail.

7

Hamster

You gain 1 martial arts style and LVL maneuvers. 0,1/d: Convert a Bruce Willis movie to a martial arts maneuver.

8

Cat

+10 Int and free Red Rider BB gun (2d10, rainbow silver branded)

9

Donkey

Noses’s P, 3/d: Breath Lightning (current hp, save ½ ). 0,1/d: lose X Int: 1 group takes X^2 Int dmg.

10

Bunny

+1 D action. 1D,1/d: True Resurrection self.

13

Puppy

You know Urban Librarian and Pharmicist5 drug spells. 0, 1/d: Add a feat, or spell from [A69 ].